#NotEatingAllTheThings - the demise of my diet attempts

Way back, sometime between San Francisco Marathon last year and CIM, I hit this weight, and it stuck - I was marathon training, and I was content where it was. It didn't take any real effort to stay there, and I wasn't really concerned with losing any, at least not enough to be bothered with it.

Between CIM and Eugene, though, I continued to eat kind of whatever I wanted. While that strategy worked a-okay while I was in marathon training for CIM, it was no bueno when I ran about half the mileage in my Eugene cycle. It's not a surprise that I gained a few pounds.

When Becka and I brainstormed the #NotEatingAllTheThings Challenge during Eugene and the weekend of eating EVERYTHING, I figured I would just play along and see what happened. I'm not really big on numbers, and don't really have a "goal" weight - I kind of have a "feel better at this" weight, and a "that number makes my clothes uncomfortable" weight.

So, listen. I played along with the #NotEatingAllTheThings Challenge for awhile - I still send Becka pictures of most of my meals, I still weigh in habitually on Tuesday's (official weigh in day; Friday just for funs).

Weighing in has become an exercise in frustration for me - not because I'm not hitting a certain number (I have no certain number in mind still), but because my body just seems to be perpetually screaming, "NAH NAH NAH NAH I DO WHAT I WAAAANT CAN'T TAME ME!", and I gain/lose 2-3 lbs within a few days, back and forth, over and over. It didn't really matter what I ate, or what exercise I did.

So by the numbers on the scale, this has not been a success for me. While Becka has lost something like 18+ lbs, I have lost.....

6 pounds, net. Since May. I'm dead smack right back where I was in December, last year.

I dropped a few pounds initially, and I've been hovering at the same spot for about two months now. (In full disclosure, I am currently another pound down according to yesterday's weigh in, but I'm assuming it will pop back up, because my body LOVES what I weigh THE END).

I'm still running a fairly low mileage (25ish mile weeks), but I'm doing a LOT more cross training and strength work than I have before.

I still eat kind of whatever I want, but probably more reasonable than I was early this year. Maybe.

The result of this, is that despite the number refusing to budge, I am certainly more fit than I've been... maybe ever?

Unsure why my face is being a jerk

I  have tiny muscles, even. IT'S TRUE.

Bad lighting, but I swear they exist, not just in my brain.

So, I guess this is the thing.

I don't measure weight loss in any other way - I don't use a tape measure or fancy scale. I know my clothes are looser. I know my beautiful striped Lulu Pace Setter is too big.

I know that the stupid tank top arms video used to be hard with 2lb weights, but now it's manageable with 5lb weights.

I guess my conclusions from this Challenge are:

• I'd rather feel stronger, than skinnier
• As long as I'm comfortable in my clothes, I'm pretty indifferent to my weight
• The numbers don't really mean all that much
• I'm not willing to give up foods I love
• Counting calories is BORING and tedious
• It's easy for me to get carried away and "reward" myself, when I'm being too restrictive (and I use that word VERY loosely).
• It's easier for me to eat what I want in moderation, all the time. I'm way less prone to "rewards" that way.

Anyway. I didn't want to just abandon the #NotEatingAllTheThings, without filling in the ending.

Thus concludes my experiment.

I declare Becka the winner!

Three Things Thursday

1. Since Becka and I ate all the things in Oregon last weekend, it was decided that we'd come back to the real (un-fun) world, and maybe pay attention to what we're eating.

This is a really, really un-fun experiment. But probably a necessary one, since I've gotten so lazy about... well, everything.

I swear I don't know why my running skirts are getting tight.


2. Eugene recovery seems to have DRAMATICALLY improved after I took a hot bath with epsom salts on Tuesday.

I am kind of an ice bath loyalist, but the logistics of taking an ice bath after a marathon with other people waiting for me, I just don't know how to do it. So I (obviously) skipped it after Eugene. And holy mother, I was pretty much the achiest I've ever been all day Monday and Tuesday. I tried foam rolling Monday evening, but I couldn't - the right quad was to painful to even roll it out.

Yesterday, it was so much better, and today, I jogged a tiny bit while Gabby rode her scooter to school, and it felt totally fine.

Who knew! Hot bath might be my new go-to after a long run. I will certainly not miss freezing my bits.


3. Kids are creepers.

TTT: Morning runs, Tempo Runs, and Weight Loss

1. I had to work a later shift today, so I thought it was the PERFECT opportunity to get my run in this morning. 6am, I was on the treadmill for my - dun dun DUN - 7 mile tempo run. I hate tempo runs. HATE. SO hard. I take back any nice things I have ever said about tempo runs. Goal 3 at 10:20, 2 at 9:55. Actual 10:24, 10:19, 10:19, 9:54, 9:40. Success?

2. I don't want to call it success. I thought FOR SURE after my sub-60 10K, that I would nail this, easy peasy. Not the case. I mean, I did nail it, but it was NOT EASY. It sucked, hard. And, man. You morning runners are dirty liars. It is NOT glorious. It's early, and exhausting, and now I have a full day of work still ahead of me.

3. A few months back I said I wanted to drop about 12 lbs. Since then, I've upped my mileage, been pretty diligent about eating well and watching my caloric intake. And as a result...... I've gained 1 pound. Yeah, that's true. It happened. And NO, I am POSITIVE 3 weeks of strength conditioning did not gain me a pound of muscle. So, I'm kind of at a loss. I mean, I'm not really killing myself over it, but... come on, body. Get with the program.

“Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.”

FIRST

I know you all know what BIC Bands are.

From their website:

These amazing headbands started all as a fundraiser for my run with Team In Training. I was looking for a way to raise the necessary funds to run my first half marathon. I had started to make some handy dandy headband that didn't slip because I was cheap and crafty~ friends said they'd buy them, so I decided to try my hand at making and selling them. My small little venture began and I started sewing. I donated the profits to The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.

Proceeds from the sale of BIC Bands go to support different charities each month.

For January and February, these proceeds will be going to PCRF and Team Gab!

BIC Bands has over 200 styles of bands from thick...

Minnie Mouse?

....thin...

See you later, alligator...

...skinny...

Valentine's Day is coming!

...to my favorite, the Minnie (in sparkles!)

Click HERE to shop BIC Bands!

******************************
Moving on....

I don't talk much about weight loss here, because... frankly, it's just not something I'm terribly concerned with.

Don't misinterpret this as "I'm perfect and don't need lose weight/change anything," because that's certainly not the case. I am about 12 pounds above my goal weight.

The dirty, dirty truth is, I just don't really feel like it's THAT big of a deal. Sure, it'd be nice if that 12lbs came off. I'm just not committed enough to evicting 12lbs that I'm willing to pass on delicious snacks. I'm pretty happy with how things are. I feel better than I can remember feeling in... ever.

I'm content with my body, mostly, and it's lovely.

But this is the thing that really screws with my "Plenty Happy/Happy Lazy" plan.

To get faster, I need to move less of me around. And I really, really want to get faster. I'm tired of being slow.

Sooooo... That means, I guess, that I put down that second cookie. Or maybe not snack on everything I can find from 1:30-4pm (my every-day ritual, food-scavenging. Like a hyena).

I use My Fitness Pal when I want to track my calories. Without getting rocks thrown at me, I have a tough time getting IN enough calories, unless I'm really paying attention. I also have a tough time not justifying that extra cookie because I just ran 10 miles and I know I deserve it, so I suppose it really balances out in the end.

I have lost around 30lbs in the last 2 years. I haven't done anything extraordinary. I just move more, and make more conscious choices about what I eat. I don't even necessarily make GOOD choices about what I eat, I just pay more attention to what I'm shoving in my face.

The problem with running and trying to lose weight, is you're HUNGRY. A LOT.


Maintaining my weight has never been a problem since I've started running. And whenever I take a few weeks off (hello, Jerk Shin), I instantly drop a few lbs. That's cute, and all, and it's nice because those few lbs don't come back. But not running isn't an option.

And I'm also not really a fan of any... "Diets". My philosophy is, if it has a number of days attached, or restricts anything, or asks you to forgo meals... I'm not doing it, there's no way, I'm not interested, and I'll side-eye you for trying to talk me into it. Especially if you come at me with a miracle pill.


I feel pretty strongly about this.

There is no miracle to weight loss. It's just about making decisions. It takes time. It requires a change in your overall lifestyle, NOT just for 7 days, or 30 days; the answer is not in restricting "certain" foods. It's more than that.

Since I've been running, I've been pretty much eating what I feel like. I eat what I want, and it's GLORIOUS, you guys.

But there's a disconnect between what I expect FROM my body, and what I'm putting INTO my body.

If I'm expecting improvements from myself, I need to be fueling myself to perform.

Bah. It doesn't really sound fun, does it?

But it sounds worth it. So I suppose I'll give it a shot.

Um. Yeah. that's all. Go shop BIC Bands. Thanks.

Friday Fifteen...

5 miles again last night. Still slow and steady. Infinitely better than Tuesday, though, so that's good. It took all of my willpower not to play with the speed on the treadmill and finish sub-55, but alas. I refrained, and finished 55:23. SO CLOSE. Stupid restraint.

1. I'm having some friends over for Christmas dinner (with their pinch-able-cheeked baby), and we just pinned down a dinner menu yesterday: Fried goat cheese (for her and me), roasted brussels sprouts, pull apart cheesey herb bread, mini scalloped potatoes (again for her and me), duchesse potatoes (for everyone else), rib roast, and some sort of pear dessert, because I have a ton of pears.

2. Thank you, Pinterest, for having lovely pictures of all of these things. Are we friends on Pinterest? We should be... Click HERE.

3. Deciding this was no easy matter....

4. In retaliation for denying duck (I'm assuming...), her husband sent me this beautiful thing...

But. Why? The only explanation is they hate me now.

5. I checked in with my little brother this morning (okay, he's, like, 23, so not SO little, I GUESS).

6. I still have one more piece of shopping to do. That will be done today after work. Hopefully.

7. And even after that, I have food shopping to do. Bah.

8. Plus wrapping.

9. And decorating. I mean, we're decorated, but not for dinner with guests. And normally I wouldn't, but now that I got all geeked up on some fancy dinner party, I feel like I need to decorate.

10. Do you see what I did just now? Created my own stress vacuum in my head.

11. I've lost 6 lbs since early November. That includes Thanksgiving, so we're clear. And I didn't NOT eat anything I wanted. I ate all the things that I dreamed about. And it was all glorious.

12. Take THAT, holiday chub.

13. I feel like kind of an asshole. Everyone in my office is exchanging gifts and giving me things. I had NO IDEA they did this here, so I have... nothing. I mean, I brought hummus and pretzel crisps to the pot luck, so there's that, I guess..... Sorry, folks.

13.5. Plus, I fired three people in the last week. Yeah. I'm an asshole.

14. I am SUPER DUPER excited about the girls' Christmas gifts. And The H's.

15. I am SUPER DUPER MEGA excited for the gift the H got me (WEEK of AWESOME coming up...)

Wordless Wednesday

I tend to dress myself in a mostly dark room - The H gets to sleep in. It's unfair, I know.

Yesterday, I reached in my closet, and pulled out some capri's. I was pretty bummed to find that they were a little tighter than I remembered them being. Not uncomfortably tight, just not as loose as I thought they were. I've been REALLY reasonable with what I eat, even after Sunday's race. And yet... tight pants. Really?!

I tried to ignore it.

I was dumbfounded, but assumed I just was somehow eating too much.

And then, after I got home and was changing out of work clothes, I happened to glance down at the label.

Oh, hai, size 8. I haven't worn you in.... 15 years?

These were pants I got, and stuck on a side of my closet because I liked them, but they didn't fit. So I hung on to them, like a crazy person, because SOMEDAY, they just might.

Welcome to someday.

Wordless Wednesday....

I whine (inside my head mostly) about having trouble losing weight. I eat well, I exercise, I bounce around a 1-2lb range and can't seem to budge.

But, really. Check this out.

3 months ago....

....today.

Well done, me. Well done.

Photo Friday

Have you noticed yet that I'm a blog-idea-stealer? It's kind of true.

I've been meaning to blog about weight. And weight loss. And diets, and that Racing Weight book. But I haven't.

I've also been meaning to post about how running has changed my body. But I haven't.

The Studly Runner Marcia posted about Racing Weight today, and Becka posted about P90X making her even more awesome (who knew it was even possible...), so I'm killing two birds with one stone and taking my inspiration from them. Well, three birds - Foto Friday. (that hurt to type).

I picked up Racing Weight at Barnes and Noble a few weeks ago, and used the equation to determine my "ideal" racing weight.

According to that book, I should weigh just about what my 12 year old weighs.

I'd like to lose maybe 25 lbs. That would put me about in the middle of the "healthy" range for my height. The suggested weight was 18 lbs LESS.

Madness.

I'm not a 12 year old girl. I'm a 32 yr old mom to three kids. I have hips. I have a bum. I have boobs. I don't know that I've EVER weighed what my 12 year old weighs, except maybe... when I was 12. Of course, by the time I was her age, I was a C cup already, and she's... not. Lucky.

I just don't think that weight is reasonable, FOR ME.

I eat well, mostly. More importantly, I don't go crazy with guilt when I don't eat the most healthy option. I eat in moderation. I am educated about my food choices. I am always more concerned with making the BEST, more healthy decision, over the choice that will fit in a "diet".

My metabolism is wonky, because it takes seriously like an act of Congress for me to lose weight. I've been tracking my calories (and carbs, fats, proteins, etc., via SparkPeople) for a few weeks. I've not had one day where I ate over 1850 cals in a day. My average caloric intake is around 1620 daily. According to Spark People, my BMR is 1900.

Over that same time frame (16 days), I've burned 2894 calories. That averages to 180 calories/day. If you follow the general rule that you have to burn 3500 cals to lose a single pound, I should have lost about 2 pounds in the last 16 days.

I've lost 0. Well, half of one. So 0.5 lbs down.

And that's kind of okay, because, frankly, I'm just not as concerned about being a specific weight, as I am knowing that what I'm putting in is good for me. That's the mentality I want my kids to have, as well.

And it works FOR ME.

But what's MORE important than that for me, is this...

(I swear I'm not sucking in)

These used to be skin tight on me. It wasn't the best look.

I did drop about 10 lbs between October and February, when I first started running, and then in the hospital. But since then, it's kind of plateued.

I don't run, or eat (mostly) good for me for the weight. I do it because it feels good, and I want to be healthy. Cancers and heart disease and high blood pressure and diabetes all run in my family. I want to do what I can to mitigate that. And if it means that right now I'm eating grapefruit because (1) it was a quarter, and (2) it is better for me than the Godiva chocolate covered strawberries that I *really* want, well. That's a small price to pay, isn't it?

Anyway. I guess my only point, really, is that being HEALTHY, IMO, is more important than a number on the scale. Obviously the number can indicate some risks - too high or too low - but it's the be all, end all of you, nor is it the determining factor to your fitness. The H is in great shape, and kicks my butt in most things of a physical nature, but I can take him down on any leg strength test you could name. I mean, I still can't do a "real" push up, but those squats, they're my bish.

/soapbox.

I ran last night, 20 minutes, per the suggestion of the salesperson who walked away with some nice commission after I bought new shoes and orthotics... and The Ankle cooperated!! Thanks, Ankle! First 1.75 miles of the Cupcake Marathon down!

Happy Friday! Don't forget to enter my GU and RoadID Giveaway! HERE